druxied:

if you’re hot and you follow me and I don’t follow you. you need to fucking speak up

mikauz:

thisblogismynote:

When I turn off my laptop by holding the power button as opposed to the proper way, I always feel like I’m holding its head underwater until it suffocates slowly.

underneaththisskin:

North Korea is like that kid in preschool who thinks he’s the shit for having the 16 pack of crayons when the U.S. actually has the 128 pack with the sharpener

Reblog if you don’t have girlfriend or boyfriend.

fallingdowns:

why the hell do guys expect so much from us like they want us to have a flat stomach, big ass, big boobs, pretty face, and a perfect personality while some of these guys look like fucking apes bye

sociallyawkwardjocelyn:

fnark-oreo:

thankyouforthedildos:

Whenever I’m not alone in a public bathroom I will wait until the other person flushes then pee as fast I can so they wont hear it.

i wait until its dead silent like when they’re fixing their hair and i take the hardiest piss and as i exit the stall i stare them in the face so they know my dominance over the bathroom

Two different types of people in this world

Emotions Belong To Readers

mooderino:

When it comes to using emotion in a story, the person whose emotions should be most important to you are the reader’s.

An emotionally invested reader is more likely to go wherever the story leads, and also more likely to make allowances for parts of the story they aren’t too sure about.

You can still keep readers engaged through intellectual curiosity or general drama and action, but grabbing them emotionally is always going to be the most intense experience for them.

Read More

if you get a boyfriend does that mean you have to spend less time on the internet because idk if im prepared for that

moffnat:

do you ever just cry because you suck

vegay:

DO PARENTS NOT REALISE YOU CAN HEAR THEM TALKING ABOUT YOU

allthefandomfeelings:

chesnips:

maahamburger:

you can make anything sound sexual just by whispering it

would you like a better deal on your car insurance

oh baby lower my rates

i-o-u-a-fall:

nooby-banana:

farareusis:

angeldicks:

pants with fake pockets

suit jackets with fake pockets

FAKE POCKETS

~HOT POCKETS~